Fridays

I keep hoping to find a way to
run into all your Fridays
hang around until the sun cries out
or when we decide it's time

shadows follow with every second step
lingering around the sudden smile
where hope resides.
my anguish isn't in the trying
or attempting to
or even inside your beautiful words
pressed between sullen flashes of gut wrenching flares
from the underside.
it's where you reside
and I've come to accept it.
accept you.
even when I don't want to, I find myself back
beside the same old track
and we go again
like pebbles and fine wine

I have always desired a love so rare
true love.
the kind we watch on the big screen
listen to with eager ears
not meant to be,
not with me.

the seeds of dysfunction were planted ages ago
before the smitten could rise
before the pattern was set
before rhythm had rhyme
and all I'm left with are these Fridays...


ajs/2.6.13