it always comes back to you
every time
no matter how far I wander
no matter how many I ram rod
roll over
obliterate
you are the one that could have been
forever,
I am the fool for waiting and delaying
constantly,
how could I blame you for my insecurities
I am the one who lagged behind,
stuck in my doubts
raging aloud,
I have only myself to
condemn
and I do ...
(11/20/2008.ajs)
16 comments:
Really liked this poem. Keep up the great work! Very enjoyable.
Posted by George Hoerner on 11/21/08 at 06:51 AM
Self condemnation is the worst kind. Sometimes I think it less what we do than circumstance. A nod when it should have been a smile or the eyes blink when they should have been closed.
Thanks George, I do agree...
Posted by Nanette Bellman on 11/21/08 at 07:20 AM
the first stanza is a powerhouse alisa and the second is just so heart-wrneching. very good.
Thanks, Nanette
Posted by Steve Baba on 11/25/08 at 07:01 PM
I could really feel the emotion in this poem. Well done!
Thank you Steve for your time and comments...
When one stops beating themselves up for what they did or may not have done they will realize that no matter what they would have done, could have done, should have done doesn't factor into the grand scheme of things, but omg don't I know just how this feels...
Posted by Robin on Nov 21, 2008 7:02 AM
I agree, Robin... totally....
However, there are those moments when one can't help but wonder... you know?
ah! such bittersweet memories, albeit it treasured ones.
alisa ;-)
Ahhh...love this...tis a thinking piece...I must comment on the condemning bit...does not one damn bit of good to condemn oneself , to feel guilty , to have regrets. A realization that I have recently come to. All we can do is to learn from mistakes, understand why we made them and realize that they may have not have even been a mistake at all. And when faced with a similar situation, be aware and act accordingly. We learn the most from our mistakes and failures, I think. I could go on and on talking about destiny and fate and ponder whether we make our own fates through action and thought, but when you are talking about relationships, it takes two to make it happen. So, now you need to go to that beautiful ocean of yours and cast off the regrets and the condemnations, let the Hawaiian winds carry them off and feel the burden lifted from your soul, Princess. Now, Onwards! lol.
Posted by Tara on Nov 21, 2008 3:57 PM
Thank you both, Robin and Tara....
Ah, the complexities of life and love! And all that in between!
lol
I think the most marvelous thing of all is that we have life! And as long as we have breath, we have hope for another day...as long as our heart continues to beat, as long as our arms continue to reach, we will continue to be.
Knowing there will be the bitter with the sweet....
Sending you both wishes for a fabulous Thanksgiving holiday....
alisa ;-)
Posted by aj on Nov 22, 2008 7:41 AM
I must agree with tara, I think that if I lived closer to the serenity of the ocean, I would pour each regret or condemnation into a paper boat and sail it away, willing it to never return. no one should ever question love, even if in the end is has turned , for at one time it was love and there should be not regret in loving. thought provoking piece.
Posted by Soulwalker on Nov 23, 2008 8:33 PM
Thank you, Amy....
This one was inspired by someone very dear to my heart and soul. Someone who, for whatever reason will forever remain... imprinted on my spirit.
Someone who, has no beginning or end as we will always be in the moment of the memory, the realization of what will always be... a priceless treasure.
And any missteps that were taken were of my own undoing... and for that, I do take complete responsibility.
Happy Thanksgiving!
alisa ;-0
Thank you, Steve for stopping by... alisa ;-)
Been there got the t shirt :) I try try try and try some more but it always comes back to haunt me, yet it takes two to let it go. Perhaps we can find comfort in the hope that these are lessons were ment to learn in our journey through life, and we each have our own leasons to learn(karma), with love over come our pain and be set free.
Thanks for your comments. I have been looking for them. You are correct in what you say, for sure... and yet, don't we always wonder, sometimes? I know I do... alisa
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