True Treasure to Me

How does one maintain a grip on reality
When everything that once was real, no longer exists?
But rather, faded from your life
Like a black and white photo left out in the rain ...

Images barely recognizable, once so vivid and clear
now reduced to the strength of sand castles after the morning tide,
All that remains is a faint impression at best
Of what you thought was permanent and would stand the test of time,
Do hopes and dreams vanish along with one's changing circumstance
Setting in motion a continual decline,
As one by one they slip and no longer can be grasped as before ...

The perfect home with the breathtaking views
From the mountains to the endless Pacific,
Where you sat spellbound, taking in each sunrise,
From forty three floors above the cobalt sea,
Witnessing the changing of the guard
As the stars would take their final bow,
And the sunbeams announce each new day
first by peeking behind the clouds,
And it was all so magnificient and stupendous
Feeling so secure and safe each time you closed both sets of
double solid mahogany doors, ten feet tall, breathing a sigh of relief,
You were home and all was well.
And your friends all around, always there
sharing in your good fortune ...

And then this home, this perfect home, this realization of a dream
held another aspect, that it was no longer as it once seemed,
For eight long months this perfect home, began to reveal
An insidious secret to change the course of events
My once perfect home no longer wanted to be my residence,
And the nightmare began,
As toxic mold poisoned my cats, my friends, my business and me ...

Is access only granted when you hold the key
To benefits and advantages for those with whom you wish to be?
Am I remiss in my thinking that true friendship weathers
both good and bad seasons?
Not merely a convenience during the harvest moon ...

If I find myself wandering in the deserted realm of friendship
while famished in the time of lack,
This tends to beg the question, were those ever really true friends
or merely images that faded in the rain?

If you tell me you love me, and want me for all time
Is this only true when the music plays
When the birds sing, when the magic is there and smiles all around?
Does true love stop and walk away
When dark clouds appear on the horizon?
When gale force winds were just the beginning
of a full scale category five hurricane?
Along with the aftermath and deluge
Does true love simply vanish? Simply forget your name?
And you find yourself once again
left out in the rain ...

What is reality other than one's perception?
Who is it that determines success or failure?
I find it amazing those who find comfort in labels
Are rocked to their knees with sudden change,
If I own a Penthouse, you want to be near me
But if I am homeless, you don't want to know me,
What ever happened to all that was true?

Life changing lessons will certainly prove
At least to this humble traveler one basic fact,
The worth of another is revealed by what's within
Has no bearing at all on possessions and things,
Your heart is the treasure, your soul is the key
and the state of your mind determines what is to be ...

I will rise again like the Phoenix,
In complete and total victory,
Recover my losses and gain so much more
Restore all that was taken and know
I have weathered yet another storm,
And continued to believe in me, my dream, and my destiny
Even as others around me
faded in the rain ...

by :ajs